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[OS] if you #bangjae
@meanjan
2024-06-27
bangjae yongguk youngjae bap

I sit and hug my knees and cry every night...

My heart keeps calling out to him.....

If it wasn't me... Will you come back?

If it wasn't me who hurt you that day... You wouldn't leave like you are now...

I'm sorry... please come back while our hearts still cry out to each other.

I want to let you go...

But I'm really sorry. My heart can't do that. It's not easy at all....

The tall figure moved on the bed, slowly opening his eyes to look beside him as he was accustomed to.

But just like before... empty

He had only been asleep for less than four hours. Every day at four o'clock in the morning he wakes up.

To wait to see if that person has returned yet.

Yongguk smiles to himself... He got up and walked up to the roof of the building.

At 4 a.m. the weather was quite cold. The sky at four in the morning was still dark.

It's dark, but there are still some lights that help illuminate it. The gentle breeze blows, but it cools you to the bone.

“I know it's cold up there, so why don't you wear thick clothes? Hmm?”

Yongguk walked over to cover Youngjae with a blanket and hugged the other person from behind. He knew that little people liked to walk around naked. Even though the weather is this cold

"I knew it had to be like this......so I waited for you to cover me with a cloth and hug Youngjae."

Looking at the sky but still smiling at Yongguk's expression of concern for his lover's well-being.

"If you're not here, who will bring a cloth to cover you?"

Yongguk tightened his hug and kissed the small man's head. The wind blows from time to time, he will hug Youngjae like this. I won't let another person be cold, he will stay like this... I will always take care of Youngjae...

“Youngjae then go find him to come back and cover him, haha.”

“I won't let you go anywhere. I have to be with Youngjae like this.”

Youngjae turned and hugged Yongguk tightly. He buried his face in the other person's chest and the blanket fell to the floor.

... Don't go looking for anyone. Stay with me..

If I'm not good....

If I'm stupid...

If I don't take it anywhere.. I'll adjust, just stay with me...

“Yongguk hyung... Youngjae loves you.”

Yongguk smiled at the person in front of him and gently supported his face and kissed his forehead and held it like that. Youngjae closed his eyes and used his arms to hold the tall person's waist loosely for a long time..

Sunlight streams through the curtains that sway in the breeze and onto the open window. Yongguk adjusts his eyes to the morning light. He looked at the window. It looked like the daisies he had planted in the pot outside the window were now blooming, and the person in bed at this time hurriedly got out of bed to look at the flowers he had planted... daisies. The flowers that Youngjae likes...

He also likes...

“Brother Yongguk!! You can wake up and eat.”

“Youngjae.. our flowers are blooming. Come and take a look.”

The person in the kitchen who was preparing breakfast ran over to look in excitement. He found it on the side.

The road back home looked like it had turned into a restaurant. Good thing he decided.

Let's plant it here.

“Yongguk hyung, look now... It is very beautiful.”

“Yes... really beautiful.”

Yongguk reached forward and kissed Youngjae's cheek, who was now smiling at the flowers in front of him.

"Wait a minute! Brother, you can't be careless."

The little man smiled sheepishly and then went to prepare breakfast. Yongguk looked up and smiled at the other person, who now seemed to signal him to take a shower and then come eat breakfast together.

Our memories that I secretly put in my drawer,

I take them out and reminisce again by myself.

“Did Youngjae see the paper on the table?”

Yongguk rummaged through the table to find the lyrics he had lost sleep in writing, but now he couldn't find them. Even though he had left it on the table last night.

“Oh..uh, what is it? This morning Youngjae picked up the table and found a piece of paper so he threw it away.”

The little man walked up to Yongguk.

“Scrap paper.. ??”

Yongguk turned his head to look at Youngjae angrily with a dissatisfied expression on his face.

“Youngjae doesn't know what it is, Yongguk hyung..”

“Y...Youngjae is sorry..”

He hurriedly walked over and hugged the other person's arm. I don't want him to be upset or yell any more because he knows how scary it is when Yongguk is angry. Yongguk remained silent and didn't say anything.

“D..Wait Youngjae, go downstairs and look for me. Maybe the garbage truck hasn't come to pick it up yet.”

Youngjae spoke with a trembling voice as clear water slowly overflowed his eyes.

“That's where I should go. Get out of my face.. Youngjae.”

It was the first time that Yongguk dared to say the words 'you, me' out loud for Youngjae to hear. It might not be serious to some people, but with Youngjae, it wasn't.

“Yongguk hyung.. are you this angry at Youngjae?”

The tears that had overflowed now slowly flowed down in streams. He said while crying as the little man walked over and hugged Yongguk. He didn't think Yongguk would dare to chase him away.

Yongguk pushed Youngjae away until he fell to the ground. He picked up a pot of daisies and threw it nonchalantly on the ground.

So cool!!

“Do...do you hate Youngjae? I want Youngjae to go, so you have to do this, right..”

Youngjae gets up and runs outside in tears.

I waited for him until evening and he still didn't come back...

Where are my good people?

Have you lost your way?

Where we used to go together... I'm waiting there, Youngjae..

The lyrics that I wrote..I wrote the song for Youngjae..

I want to tell Youngjae.. 'I love Youngjae.'

This word has never been uttered. . .. I'm sorry, you can come back now, I'm a good person .. .

I should have been more calm at that time. Then comfort Youngjae... 'I'll just write a new song one more time'

Why don't I say this?

Even though I saw another person feel guilty...

Even though I saw another person in tears..

Even though the other person said sorry.. I'm a bad person. .

Come back and listen first. I want to say “I love Youngjae.” Can you come back?

'Yongguk hyung!! Wake up and eat now'

I don't want to wake up from this dream.. I'd like to sleep more..I'd rather see you in person than having to wake up alone. Please let me sleep like this forever. Dreams with Youngjae are happy..

If it's not too late..can we come back to loving each other like before..

finish .

The ending of this story is for the readers to imagine, hehe.

But Wright gives the ending of this story: Yongguk dies.

T^T 

But Youngjae also doesn't know if it's a bad death or not.

TT^TT 

O W E N TM.

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