"I want a chance... Chances are that Jaebeom hyung will love me."

"But in the end, I'm just a fool... For loving him with all my heart.."

old fool

CR.SQW

fool

Words..are something that once we give, we can't take it back.

It is like the truth. That God created humans to be different from other species of animals on this planet...

Love..is like an apple.

..Fragrant flavour, attractive color, tempting to eat and absorb.

But what if that apple was the witch's apple that Snow White had eaten?

How many other humans are still indifferent to its taste?

Only stupid people... would do that.

And Jinyoung..was just a fool..in a stupid situation that God had ordained for him.

"I said..I like you, Jinyoung..." A single short sentence came out from the person in front of him. It makes my heart beat so fast I can't tell you. I clearly looked at the face of the person who told me he liked me again. Then he pressed his hand against his thigh to prove that he wasn't dreaming.

...Jaebeom hyung...said he likes me.

"P...Uncle Jaebum," I stammered the name of the person in front of me. Then he looked at the fierce eyes of the person in front of him. I tried to hide the joy that rose in my chest. Do not let facial expressions But when I saw the cheeky smile that the person in front of me sent, it almost made me shudder...

"I won the bet, Bam! I paid 2 dollars!!" JB shouted loudly, like he was half shouting. Even though it was very dark in the dormitory's dark living room, But in the blink of an eye, the entire room flashed brightly. Because the light switch was turned on by Bambam's handiwork.

The look on BamBam's face that was laughing with delight.. meant that he had seen everything from the beginning..

They were just teasing me... But why don't I find it funny?

I put my right hand on my left chest. The sound of my heart pounding almost drives me crazy. And that made me realize some truths in my heart that I never thought I'd admit.

I like a guy named Im Jaebum..

..I lost a bet with God that I was stupid enough to taste this poison apple.

Until now, I can't suppress the happiness that arises...

I looked at the crumpled soda can I accidentally crushed when I thought about last night. that happened at our dorm

A stupid soda can..and a stupid person named Jinyoung.

It's strange..but this stupid soda can describes my current state of feeling very well. both external conditions and inner state of mind

...It was so messy...and so bad that I felt sorry for it.

I don't want to be alone in my bullshit. And let my mind wander just because of the stupid soda can I put in it to relieve my feelings. repressed within the mind

I walked to the trash can. And try not to act weird like throwing it into the trash.

But my distracted mind told me that what I wanted was to put myself in the trash instead.

I didn't have the face to go back to the dorm...I didn't have the face to even meet the other members.

Especially..that person

He probably hates my face.....

In the eyes of Jaebum hyung who sent it to me at that time I can tell you my heart nearly fell to the floor. Those eyes were cold and full of disgust. It made my entire face numb.

And..decided to escape the dorm the next morning.

I didn't escape to do something stupid like jump off a bridge and kill myself, as everyone understands. I just need time to recover.

Just like when people are sick..they have to recuperate and get better, right? The only difference is that in my case it was an illness of the mind, not the body.

Come out and get some air. Come out and get some wind, it should be better...

I just thought it would be better...

I carried my wounded body inside to the restaurant and stepped inside. I bowed my head slightly to the owner's aunt as a courtesy. Then I stepped in and sat at the same table that I always liked to sit at...

But why is the chair across from me so lonely?

Before long, the shop owner's aunt walked out carrying Park Bingsu. I came so often that she remembered what I liked. She smiled at me and the words she said almost made me cry.

"What about the other friend..he didn't come?" I remained silent. Her eyes were full of love for the feelings rising inside my body. It made me lower my head to hide my watery eyes and slowly nod.

"Yes..We had a little argument.."

"But that friend of mine seems like a good person...let's get back together soon." I used the tip of my index finger to wipe the tears under my eyes. Then he raised his head and smiled at him even though his eyes were closed.

It's like pretending to be bright..even though your eyes are still filled with tears.

Is it painful?

I looked at the bingsu in front of me that had the red bean flavor that I like to eat. The memories from the past together made me smile even though my eyes were still bloodshot.

"Uncle Jaebum!! This is my Bingsu! You don't like red beans, right? Bring it back!!"

"I don't even like red beans. But I saw you eating deliciously, so I was wondering if it was really delicious or not,” Jaebeom said, then took a spoon and scooped another bite of bingsu into his mouth. before smacking Jinyoung's forehead

"It's not as bad as I thought..."

"I'm here.. I've been looking for you for a long time." A deep voice calling from behind along with a gentle pressure on my shoulder made me jump and I automatically turned to look at the new person.

"Mark.." I said softly. The spoon in my hand was released and placed on the plate. The feeling deep in my heart is that I am disappointed..

Disappointed that the person in front of me is not Jaebum's brother...

"Why did you run away? Do you know that everyone is worried that things will get worse for you?!" BamBam cried because that kid thought he was an angry fortune teller!!"

"You're not a child anymore...learn to be reasonable, Jinyoung..." The soft sound of my name coming from the mouth of the person in front of me made me feel guilty. My expression probably looked hurt until I knew exactly how I felt. Mark loosened his grip on my shoulder and placed it on my head instead.

I don't mind..there were no words between the two of us.

Mark's stern voice sounded stern. ..It makes me feel guilty about people I shouldn't have anything to do with.

I'm sorry...I was a really bad older brother.

I lowered my eyes. But he didn't resist taking Mark's hand off his head.. I don't want to cry for others to see. Because I was afraid that he would know that I was very weak.

Think about it..if Mark knew who I was like this for..he would definitely not let Jaebum hyung go.

I don't want anything to happen to Jaebeom hyung..just because of my feelings of not being okay.

“I was just bored...so I ran away to play. I'll be back in a moment, don't worry." I said before grabbing the wrist of the person in front of me. Then squeezed gently to confirm that what I said was not a lie.

I smiled at Mark. Even though I know that another person will probably see my bloodshot eyes..

But..Mark is a well-mannered person who doesn't want to know anything about me. He always has space for the conversation so that it doesn't get too uncomfortable.

He's a good person...I know that.

Mark didn't say anything but took a break and walked out of the store. Even though he didn't say anything to me. But I know that when he goes out and meets other members He would pretend he had never met me before.

He..knows what I want.

Mark is a good person like this...all the members are good people. Until it made me feel uncomfortable.

I looked at the bingsu in front of me and my craving for dessert disappeared. I got up from the table and walked over to the owner's aunt to order some bingsu to take back to the dorm to share among the members.

At least..I won't feel any more guilty than this.

It might make Jaebeom hyung look at my face even more, who knows...

I don't know if it's because I don't want to go back to the dorm yet or what.. But I took my body to a park not too far from the previous location and sat down on a bench.

The direction of the bench made me look at the playground where the children played. But that's what I want to come to this place

"..Jinyoung..that boy looks like you.."

“Like what? What are you talking about?” Jinyoung said. He looked at the boy's smiling face as he rocked the swing. ..He looks very happy.

There is nothing like me at all...

"His smile..looks as bright as when you smile..."

“Therefore..you should smile often, do you understand Jinyoung?”

"Brother.. Big brother!!” The voice called out and the force of the nudge caused Jinyoung to wake up from his thoughts. He looked at the face of the boy who had just poked him a moment ago. My body was covered in dust and sand, causing me to swallow the words I was about to say. And I had to swallow hard when I saw it. Boy's knee wound

...The wound hasn't closed yet... Just this little child

"Is something wrong, young man?" I said and crouched down. To listen to this child He looked very small to the eye, his height not even reaching my waist even though he was sitting there.

“My friend's balloon was stuck in a tree. ...and if I can't bring it down.. She won't stop being angry at me..." He said before a small finger pointed out at a nearby tree.

Those brightly colored balloons stuck so high... it gave Jinyoung the idea that this boy needed my help.

...He's a little boy. who tries to do everything for the person he loves

He's braver.. than me.

"Wait...this brother will bring it for you... Wait here..." I said before gently rubbing the boy's head. Then smile at the person in front of you.

I adore him...that's how I feel about him.

...Jaebeom hyung probably feels like I'm just a younger brother to him.... Everything he does is good. It's just because he loves me as a younger brother.

He did nothing wrong... Only I'm wrong

It was wrong to think that Everything he did for me It's something that feels like you always have special privileges over others.... even though in reality it's not true at all.

"Thank you... That my brother helped me.."

"I'm the one who should thank you..." I ruffled the boy's hair one more time. Before waving goodbye to this boy I still keep walking If I didn't hear applause and familiar faces first.

"Wow... What a hero... You..." Jackson said, looking at me admiringly. It made me feel creepy that suddenly something greasy was happening to me.

“Why are you here?” I said, before I could hardly swallow my words. Because when I realized that Right now all the members are looking for me.

"Come...find you. Let me drink you some water and kill you a little bit," Jackson said before raising his shoulder at me. He handed me a can of the type of soda he likes to drink. Then he opened another can in his hand and downed it. Then he lowered his head to look at my face.

"Are you fighting?... With Jaebum hyung..." Jackson said while the two of us We decided to sit under the tree that we walked out from the playground for a while and found that it was quiet and seemed so free of people that it made us only two people in this world talking.

"Um...not really..." I said and looked away. I'm not the kind of guy who's slouchy. And like the lead actor in the movie, he cries in every scene. But when I avert my eyes Because I knew I was trying to escape the question that Jackson would ask in the next word.

"Tell me about it?" I sighed and secretly looked at Jackson's face. The two of us were unusually quiet. There was no conversation between us, we looked into each other's eyes as if we were about to compete in a staring game. But Jackson's eyes were filled with concern. It made me reluctant to spit out the truth. All things that I like about Jaebum... and things that happened yesterday

"Oh! What are you doing!?!” I cried out when Jackson reached out and flicked my forehead. He twitched a smile at the corner of his mouth. before speaking to me with a serious expression that is not often seen

The truth... outer shell of cheerfulness It doesn't help the seriousness. And Jackson's recklessness could completely swallow it up.

“I didn't expect you to be this stupid…” Jackson said, looking at the soda can in his hand. Then turn your eyes to another direction. It's like he's trying to suppress his emotions. The sincerity in his voice made his feelings known.

..He didn't say that I... He's just worried about me.

"What are you doing like... You just killed Jaebum hyung's parents... Even though this is really a big deal.." Jackson said, making a joke. It made me unable to help but smile instead of answering anything.

..but the truth in my heart It felt like a gas pipe that had been capped. As soon as he spoke, the repressed feelings inside made me completely believe Jackson's reckless and stupid idea.

"Did you...tell me you like Jaebum hyung yet?" I looked at Jackson's face. before turning his head again and shaking his head lightly. Instead of answering last night, I almost said it.

...but at that time I still thought of keeping it a secret in my heart... Probably the best for Park Jin Young.

"Eh!" I cried out as Jackson suddenly stood up to his full height. He brushed away the dust and dirt on his pants. Then he stretched out his hand to pull my body up.

"What time will you be returning to the dormitory? Just call and tell me... I'll wait to hear good news..."

I shook my head and gave him a wry smile. before taking a punch and lightly punching Jackson's shoulder. Jackson's overbearing attitude made me laugh all day long.

"Thank you," I said with a smile on my face. Jackson swayed his shoulders nonchalantly and smiled. He cupped his hands into fists and kissed them, raising them to the sky. It makes me smile. Before waving goodbye

...Jackson is a good person... But he was too stupid not to know the answer to the ending.

I already know... That the ending... will be like...

I looked at the bridge over the river as far as I could see. Then he decided to do the stupidest thing in his life. I picked up the phone

Then press to go to the last miss call that came into my device.

"Hello...Jaebeom... Come find me.."

"I think... we really have something to talk about..."

I never stopped liking him....

And I never thought of stopping liking him....

Now it's time... I have to do everything right.

I sat and waited in the middle of the bridge on the pedestrian walkway. The coldness made me tighten my outer coat tighter than before. I rubbed my hands before blowing a warm breath into it. The coldness that began to creep into South Korea This made me start blaming my own stupidity for forgetting to bring an outer layer of sweater before leaving the dormitory.

...but for sure Thinking about it now, it probably isn't too late.

“Ah!” I cried out when I saw a tall, slender figure at the foot of the bridge. With his height and wide chest It makes no matter what he wears, he always looks good like a Korean model.

..that's for sure... Many fans are already head over heels in love with him.

Including me... Even if you're not a fan.

"What's wrong?" His short words made me not even dare to look the person in front of me in the eye. I bit my lip and sucked in a breath. Before looking at the face of the person in front of him and mustering up his courage

"Jaebeom hyung...I think I like you..."

He was silent, not even responding to me. I could only grit my teeth and hold back the tears that welled up in my eyes. I swallowed the pain. Until I felt trembling all over my body. But the person in front of him remained silent.

He looked at me... But he still kept quiet...

Damn it... Is it like this to be rejected by someone?

It hurts so much I'm going to die....

A lump throbbed in the left side of my chest. It made me feel stabbing pain. But I still forced a small smile. Then he wiped away the tears that were starting to fall under his eyes with his fingers. And the fact that he was still silent made me feel irritated.

He never asked to like him. But why do I still insist on liking him? He never rejects me when I cuddle him or cuddle him in his lap. He never makes me feel bad when I'm around him...

This time came before....

“You made a bet with BamBam, right? Jinyoung??” The words that came out caused me to feel pain. I clenched my fists tightly and secretly looked at his expression that was unmoving.

I'm...sad that I always thought that he must have some interest in me. It would be good.

"Jaebeom hyung..." I put my hand on the shoulder of the person in front of me. Then squeeze tighter I squeezed it so tight that I thought if the person in front of me was me, he would probably cry out.

..but he was still.

"Jaebeom hyung... don't be so quiet..." I said it. I can't hold it in my heart anymore. The warm, clear water flowing from its eyes felt like some kind of motivation that made me decide to raise my head and face the person in front of me.

..If I'm going to get hurt.. At least I want him to still talk to me. It's not quiet like this.

It hurts more than being slapped by the person in front of you...

"You can scold me!! You can still punch me!! But it's not quiet like this!!"

"I like you... I've always liked you... but to me, you're just a fool who's madly in love with you... I've always believed that for a moment in your heart, you probably don't feel like it." It's different... But... why!!" I screamed. The tears that flowed endlessly were not as painful as the lump on my left breast that looked like it wanted to scream. If it can be done

It hurts... I know...

"Answer me!!... Im Jaebum!! Please tell me that everything isn't true!! his I gripped it so tightly that my hand hurt. But his expression was still. The look in his eyes made me gasp.

I raised my fist and punched the man in front of me hard on the jawline...

"Say something!! I...want to get over my feelings from you!! It's already hurting like this..." The tall figure's arms wrapped around me and tightened. He ran his hand through my hair. I absorbed the warmth and gentleness from the person in front of me. Then he slowly decided to extend his arm and wrap it loosely around the body of the person in front of him and bury his face in his shoulder.

"I'm sorry..."

Time... is something that once passed will never come back.

And now my time is up....

"Uncle Jaebum! Jinyoung!...."

"His time is up, Bam... He's dead...

He has died from my heart... So we can probably be together now..."

END.

Let's interpret it. Put in eggs or whatever.

I hope everyone enjoys this.

Can I talk to Wright outside of the circle? You can read Wright's other fics as well.

@jenganchalee

I love you.