Too good at good bye

-2Seung-

Every time you hurt me, the less that I cry

Every time you hurt me The less I cried

And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry

And every time you leave me My tears dried up faster.

And every time you walk out, the less I love you

And every time you walk away I love you less...

“Are you tired?”

“Um, tired.”

“Then we.. should we break up?”

“I think sometimes saying goodbye It might be better..”

"um.."

Talk :

The fic arose from the writer wanting to read the Two-Sung couple very much.

But it was quite difficult to find and read, so I wrote it myself.

I also want to try decorating a tutu like this.

Anyway, thank you in advance for coming to read.

thank you :

D

Thx.

Theme Song : Too good at goodbyes

B

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Theme : B E R L I N

[Seungyoon]

“Have you come back yet?”

"um.."

"Are you hungry? I'll go get you something to eat."

“A little is good.”

“Wait a moment.”

It's now three o'clock..

I haven't slept yet because I have to wait for the other person to come back to our room. I know that Seunghoon hyung often forgets to eat dinner at work. When I come back late at night, I will be very hungry. So I chose not to go to bed yet to wait in case the other person wanted to eat something.

“Now there is only ramyun left. Can you eat it?” I thought after disappearing into the kitchen for a while. A cup of hot ramyeon filled to the brim with toppings, as if he was afraid the other person would not be satisfied, was placed in front of him.

“I can eat it, thank you,” Seunghun hyung said as he picked up his chopsticks and popped bramyeon into his mouth. While I myself sat down across from him to watch the other person eat. “You can go to sleep, Seungyoon.”

“You don't want anything, right? I'm going to sleep.” As soon as he opened his mouth, I asked him that to make sure he didn't need anything else tonight.

“Um,” Seunghun hyung replied shortly.

“Then, good night, hyung. I'm going to bed.” I got up before walking out of the kitchen, not forgetting to turn around and remind the elders not to forget to take a shower and brush their teeth before going to bed.

“Please take things into the room. I'll follow you in.”

"um"

The conversation ended there. I walked out of the kitchen and went to get my jacket. The other person's bag and cell phone went to our bedroom.

I put everything on Seunghun hyung's desk. On it was a photo of us together taken after our first date at the Han River. Both of their faces smiled happily. Especially Seunghoon hyung, who smiled so wide his eyes closed and put his hand on my shoulder. While I seem to be smiling more awkwardly.

We looked happier then than we do now. We talk and touch each other often. We usually tell each other we love each other every morning and before bed, when we're sad, angry, or fighting. We never once turned our backs on each other and always forgave each other.

And we do it until we get used to it.

That familiarity may make us feel bored.

Hmm, probably like that. Because after we have been together for many years I felt that we were both beginning to change. Maybe it's because of our advancing age or our jobs that lately our times don't match up. We meet less Talk or touch each other as much as necessary. And of course, no matter what I or he did that would displease the other party.

We just tell the other person that it's okay.

Every time he hurts me I felt myself regret less.

And I know that Seung Hoon hyung would be the same too..

Stunned

Just like now..

A message from someone came through his number, causing the screen to flash up. I picked up my cell phone and asked Seunghun hyung to dial in a very familiar code. Press to read the message even though you know exactly who sent the message.

'Seunghun-ah, thank you very much for coming to help today. See you again.

I love you, Jinwoo.

That's it. It's from Kim Jin Woo. A sweet-faced senior who works at the same place as him. These two people seem unusually close these days after working on a project together last time. Which used to bother me for a while. Until I couldn't stand it and talked to my boyfriend about it.

And it got so out of hand that it turned into a fight.

“How stupid, Seungyoon! I told you he's a senior at work!”

“Do seniors at work have to kiss each other on the cheek? I'm your boyfriend. Let's see their heads!”

"As long as you're in a cooler mood, let's talk.."

And then he walked away like that, leaving me sitting and crying all alone.

The images of that day are still clear in my memory. Whenever I think about it, I feel a sharp pain on the left side of my chest and often makes me cry helplessly.

It's the same now. I'm crying quietly But the sorrow and tears dried up so quickly that it was surprising.

I think my sensibility has leveled up again.

“What are you watching, Seungyoon? Why not gone to sleep yet"

My lover's voice brought me out of my trance. I turned to look at Seunghoon hyung for a moment before giving him a slight smile and handing the cell phone back to its owner.

“I'm sorry I was too presumptuous to open it. Jinwoo hyung sent a message. Don't forget to answer him."

"um.."

I lay down on the bed as I picked up the charged phone on the nightstand, unlocked the screen, and tapped into the green chat program before pressing my fingertips to the keyboard. Then I sent it to my close friend Song Minho.

K.Seungyoon :

Minho-ah!

K.Seungyoon :

Are you asleep yet?

MINO :

not yet

MINO :

What's going on? Why aren't you sleeping?

K.Seungyoon :

I cannot sleep

MINO :

Same old story?

K.Seungyoon :

um

MINO :

Where would you like to go, Seungyoon?

MINO :

If it were me, I would've stomped that guy to death.

K.Seungyoon : 5555

K.Seungyoon :

I'm not as talented as you, Na Minho.

MINO :

You can come see me at the store if you're feeling unwell.

K.Seungyoon :

Well, thank you.

MINO :

Hey Seungyoonna, please stop being so depressed.

MINO :

You know that everyone and I love you very much, right? I don't like seeing you sad.

K.Seungyoon :

I know.

K.Seungyoon :

Because I love you too. So I don't want my story to bother you and other people.

MINO :

Then you can go to bed, son of a bitch. I'll open the shop tomorrow.

K.Seungyoon :

um

K.Seungyoon :

sweet dreams

I smiled after the conversation ended. When I'm uncomfortable, I always talk to my close friend like Minho. Because at least it keeps me distracted for a while.

“Talking to Minho again?”

The pleading voice that I rarely heard once in a while. The side of the bed collapsed as a tall figure snuggled into the same blanket as me with long arms holding my waist close to the other's chest.

“Um,” I answered shortly and put down my phone while looking at Seunghun hyung's expression. He usually does this after talking to Jinwoo hyung.

“I love Seungyoon.”

Seunghoon hyung said as he grabbed me and turned me around to receive a soft kiss from him. His thin lips stayed like that for a while without any aggression before pulling them away and pulling me into a hug. My face was buried in his warm chest. But I didn't feel any better about him telling me he loved me and kissing me after that situation.

It was like reinforcing that he had done something wrong. It was like he was covering up his own faults.

I knew it, but I still allowed him to hug me and raised my arms to hug me back. The warmth from his body and the smell of the soap he liked to use didn't make my heart flutter because I felt embarrassed like before. On the contrary, it throbs hard and hurts every time I'm near him. Why?

“I love Seungyoon.. I love you, my dog..."

Seunghoon hyung kept telling me he loved me before his soft voice gradually died out. The rhythmic breathing that began to come in and out made me realize that he was asleep.

I raised my head to look at that handsome face softly. His eyebrows, eyes, nose, and mouth were all still the same. But what has changed is probably more inside.

I smiled and said goodnight to Seunghoon hyung without him hearing. And when I was sure he was asleep, I said something while looking at his tired face from work.

“Are you tired..? Having to endure the same old things like this.”

I don't know what inspired me to say this. But I don't plan on stopping talking either.

“Give me a little more time..”

“If I'm sure I can live without you when...” I said, burying my face in his chest, hoping it would dry up the tears that were beginning to well up before finishing my sentence.

“I will go myself.”

[Seunghoon]

In fact, I still haven't slept very well. I was also woken up by the soft sound of the puppy in my arms whispering such crazy things to me.

“When I'm sure I can live without you…” the tight-lipped boy said, burying his face in my chest before the wetness seeped through the fabric of the t-shirt I was wearing. Seungyoon swallowed back a sob before finishing his sentence. “I will go myself.”

As far as we've known, people like Kang Seung Yoon have never lied even once.

That makes me afraid that one day he will be able to live without me and leave me. If that were the case, I would be the one who would be very sad.

I love him.. Yes, you read that right. I love Seungyoon very much. As much as a man can love another person. Or maybe more than that. But because of many things, I can't express as clearly as before how much I love him, and I tend to accidentally neglect the feelings of little people many times.

But love alone for us may not be enough..

Seungyoon is a lonely and sensitive child. Many times I have completely destroyed his trust. But that child forgave me and the word "no problem" became a catchphrase.

Asked if I'm tired of the way I am. I can answer right away that I'm tired, and I'm very tired as well.

I'm tired of sometimes having to fight with Seungyoon over Jinwoo hyung. I could have sworn that that sweet senior and I were really just coworkers. There's no way I can think about that hyung as long as I love Seungyoon. But the little guy didn't seem to believe me much.

When we argue about this Seungyoon would often let out a slow sigh and end with the words "It's okay." Nowadays, we don't talk for reason like before because Seungyoon always cuts things off with his catchphrases like "It's okay or it's my fault" before looking at me with eyes full of confusion. I'm completely tired.

I am not as tired as Seungyoon is from everything that is going on right now. You must be many times more tired than me.

Tired.. of the uncomfortable feeling in my chest.

Some time has passed. The puppy fell asleep first, still hugging me tightly and with tears in the corners of its eyes. I studied his face for a while before kissing the soft hair and saying something to him.

“I love Seungyoon.. Believe me for a moment that you really still love me the same way.”

And I hope he wakes up and hears it. In fact, it would be difficult for someone like him to sleep deeply.

The next day

Seungyoon woke up before me. The sound of the pan hitting the spatula and the fragrant aroma of the breakfast that the child made woke me up. I stretched a bit before getting out of bed, not forgetting to tidy up the blankets.

I put on a smile and walked into the kitchen before hugging him from behind and asking what he had for breakfast this morning. The little boy was startled a bit before turning to answer me with a small smile.

“Today it's fried rice.” The little one smiled even though his eyes looked weak. That made me feel guilty about him again. “You let me go first. With all the rice burnt Then go brush your teeth properly and then come eat.”

“Yes,” I smiled at him, who still scolded me for brushing my teeth every morning like I was a child. Which I followed easily without forgetting to take the opportunity to kiss his cheek first.

“Yay, Lee Seunghun!” And the voices that come after me always make me laugh.

I disappeared for a while to take a shower and brush my teeth, then returned to the dining room before sitting down to prepare breakfast made by my lover who I hadn't eaten together in a long time. Seungyoon sat down at the dining table across from me and quietly started eating without saying anything.

And it was me who kept looking until he asked.

“What are you looking at?”

“Look at your boyfriend.”

For a moment I saw his expression change. But it was only for a moment because my puppy pretended to hide his disgusted expression before gently scolding me again.

“Don't bother me, Seunghun.”

“I really said this.”

I said and pretended to laugh, even though I was still suspicious of his attitude.

I just hoped he wouldn't say those words.

“This.. Seunghun hyung.” He put down his rice spoon and said with a serious expression. I felt the atmosphere around me become gloomy when the little boy opened his mouth to speak.

“Hm,” I pretended not to notice anything and gave him a short answer.

“Are you tired?” Ah.. he actually asked. “You mean, are you tired like you are right now?”

"..." I was silent before sighing slowly and answering honestly, "Um, tired.."

“..." Seungyoon swallowed. Tears seemed to well up in his eyes again and he forced himself to speak, “Then we..”

“What is it, Seungyoon? I didn't hear you at all.." I pretended to repeat the question in order to prolong the time a little more, knowing what he would say next.

“Then we.. should we break up?”

“I'm tired too.” A single tear rolled from the corner of his eye and disappeared. Seungyoon wasn't sobbing, but was letting tears flow as if he was venting the frustration in his heart. “Maybe it would be better to say goodbye..”

I couldn't say anything before answering, "Um."

Seungyoon nodded and told me that he needed a few more days. Once I was confident that he was strong enough, he would move out of the room we bought together as quickly as possible.

I can't say anything.

The only thing I know is that after today, he and I will never be the same again..

because I think so I stopped him who was about to walk out of the dining room with the words: “Wait a minute..”

which was able to stop Seungyoon's footsteps The little man turned around and asked me, "What's the matter?" He turned to look at me with a face stained with tears.

“Before I go, can I ask you something, Seungyoon? Just this one time.. And you won't ask me for anything again."

“What is it?”

“Can we go on a date with you and pretend we still love each other?”

[Writer]

Seunghoon brought the other to the location of their first date, the Han River. They do everything as if they still love each other. In the eyes of others, Seunghoon and Seungyoon looked like an enviable couple. They held hands, smiled and laughed together happily. Even though inside I knew that time was running out.

This visit he considered to be his last date.

Even though I secretly hope that the love he gives will make Seungyoon change his mind.

“Seungyoon, stop walking,” Seunghoon said before bending down to tie the younger man's shoelaces like the first time they had dated. “My shoelace is loose. We weren't careful at all.”

“Thank you,” and Seungyoon only gave a small smile in thanks before giving him his hand and helping him lift it up.

The little man walked in front of him slowly, taking in the atmosphere. Seungyoon seemed to especially like the Han River because it was cool and quiet. It was also a place filled with memories of him and the tall man following behind.

“I love Seungyoon.”

“Can I date you? You promise to take good care of us.”

"um.."

“Huh?”

"Yes.. I will date you because I like you a lot too."

Images of the day he was confessed to by another person popped up in his head. Seungyoon remembers how happy he was that day. How wide is your smile? And how hard my heart beats when I know that I and the senior I've secretly loved for a long time are of the same mind.

..but then that picture of happiness was replaced by the past pain. Seungyun's smile fell before he stopped walking. He raised his hand to cover his mouth as tears streamed down his face again. So he tried not to let his sobs escape and spoil the atmosphere.

Because this is the last date. And he didn't want it to end in tears like this..

“Seungyoon, why are you crying?”

The sounds and warm hugs coming from the people walking behind him made Seungyoon sob even more. The numbness he had built up suddenly shattered when he came here. Seungyoon misses this warmth so much. But my heart was too tired to dare to put myself back in the same place.

“I.. don't want to go..” he muffled as he spoke in a trembling voice, “I love.. love Seunghoon hyung.”

The little boy's words of love that he hadn't heard in a long time made Seunghoon feel a dull ache on the left side of his chest. The tall figure tightened his arms around him before slowly burying his face in the small man's head so that it would be a cushion for his tears in case he accidentally cried after the little man.

“If you love me, then why do you have to go? Little child..”

“Because I'm tired. I'm tired.." Seungyoon sobbed until he threw up. His strength was completely shattered when he realized that time was running out. “I know.. We can't continue any longer.”

“Can't I go?..” Seunghoon said, his eyes feeling hot as if he were about to cry after his little child. “What did you do wrong? I know it. Can you apologize? Can you forgive me?”

“I always told you it was okay.” Many tears continued to seep through his thin shirt as Seungyoon continued to speak. “But now I'm tired..”

“..." Seunghoon was silent. It seemed like he really couldn't change the younger man's mind. “Are you really going? My little child.."

“Um..” Seungyoon said, “I think it would be better if we parted while we still felt good..”

“If you still love me..” Seungyoon said, taking a deep breath to get air into his lungs. “Please let me go..”

“You really can't hold us back, Seungyoon-ah.. don't cry.”

Seunghoon said in a weak voice before pulling away from the younger man and raising his hand to wipe away the younger man's tears while Seungyoon himself raised his hand to wipe away the tears that didn't come out at any time for him. together

"Please don't cry.."

“When do you want to come back? You can always come back. My little child.."

"um.."

Seungyoon forced a smile and closed his eyes as those lips moved to his forehead. before slowly moving to the tip of the nose and full lips He allowed Seunghoon to slowly press his thin lips onto his soft ones, then slowly moved his lips to kiss back softly for a long time before pulling their lips apart lingeringly.

The last kiss to say goodbye

Their eyes met in a meaningful way, saying goodbye.

Both the last words spoken together and the smiles given to each other

and two figures whose backs were separated It all indicates that Everything is really over.

Baby, we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true

Darling, we don't have another chance. It's sad, but it's true.

I’m way too good at goodbyes

I'm good at saying goodbye.

Goodbye my love.

-end-