The one who only chatted with him on Facebook, the one who never had the courage to chat with him when we met. I don't know if he remembers that the owner of the account that greeted him was me and I don't know that. If I do that, will it disturb his time? Will he be annoyed? But what can I do? I want to talk to him, and I think it's best to talk like that.

- Belin -

I met him for the first time on the day of the event.

Open House

of the university That day, he wore a high school uniform from a famous public school. On his right shoulder he carried a camera.

Canon

One version is black. I don't know what the composition of the picture must be in order to get a good picture. I didn't know anything about photography. But the picture I see now His pinkish white skin Eyes that appeared to be light brown as the light fell on them. The smile he gave off to his interlocutor.

It was such a perfect sight to me that I didn't realize how long I looked at him. All I know is that I can't take my eyes off him. I realized it again when those light brown eyes turned to meet mine. I was startled like a child who was caught secretly eating candy before going to bed. Turn left and right without stopping. I'm sweating profusely.

I kept scanning my eyes, not knowing where to place my eyes. When I turned back to the same spot, I didn't see him there anymore. Sigh! Were we almost gone? 'Belin' had better hurry and find those bastards. If he stayed here any longer he would definitely do something embarrassing.

It is now 2 p.m. and my friends and I are sitting at a marble table under a tree in front of the Faculty of Economics.

At first we agreed that we would split up and go to groups that each of us were interested in. But in the end, the plan had to be changed. When 'Jack's' friend called and said he wanted to go walking together. So we decided to go along. together and go to every group that each person is interested in together Meanwhile, I glanced at Jack's camera in his hand.

I'd like to give it a try, but I don't have any knowledge. So I asked him to teach me. After a while, I still didn't understand what it was explaining. I don't know whether to blame it on my slow head or because it just wasn't for me. So I cut in short. Thank you for your effort. Before borrowing the camera and taking photos here and there, the settings were not adjusted at all. It was like that. Until after a while, it seemed like a group of people could be heard walking towards the table where we were sitting.

"Hoy! You bastard, this way!” Jack's voice sounded like he was calling someone. before a voice sounded behind me. I think it might have been a friend who made an appointment with it. So I turned around before encountering a group of men walking towards the table we were sitting at. Geez! Why do you choose to be with someone who looks good?

The whole group's looks are really nosy. I looked at each one with interest, 'Does Jack really have such a handsome friend? I don't know,' someone in our group said. I myself accidentally nodded in agreement. But it's true.

“My name is Shane, you bastard,” said the last man behind him before walking up to greet Jack. My hand holding the camera stopped as soon as I saw Chen's face. How round is the world? In the end, the man I saw this morning turned out to be a friend of my best friend.

He said hello before smiling at everyone. before his eyes landed on me. He looked down at the camera in my hand before moving his eyes back to my face and asking with a smile on his face.

“Hey!

ROLLEI 35S SILVER LIMITED EDITION

What?”

“Uh...um.” I stopped staring and turned to look at the owner of the camera who was now having fun talking with a friend. There was no sign of turning around and looking in his direction. So I just gave him a nod because I wasn't sure what model the tiny camera in my hand was.

“Shit! Is it true? Can I see it?” he exclaimed, giving her a smile. before holding out his hand to ask for the camera in my hand

“Uh, come on.” I could feel how shaking the camera phone I was handing to him. He took the camera and started pressing this and that. Some people looked up and spoke to me. Which I didn't understand what he said at all. I felt like the picture in front of me was blurry, both ears were ringing, I couldn't hear anything at all.

“Uh, Guchen, what is your name?” After a while, he lowered his hand and turned back to me, as if he had just realized that he still didn't know whose camera he had borrowed from. I was slightly startled before pursed my lips. Not convinced, she answered him in a voice that was so soft it was almost like a whisper.

“Belin”

"Hm? Belin, that's good. I'll just call you Bae," he said with a smile before looking down to continue fiddling with the camera in his hand.

It's been three days since I met him at the event.

Open House

I still don't know anything about him, except that his name is Shane and he likes to play with the camera. But after last night I checked Jack's Facebook page. I found Shane's Facebook page from a photo that Jack posted and tagged Shane. I immediately pressed his friend request before turning off my phone in excitement and going to sleep.

It opened again this morning. It appeared that he had already accepted my friend request since last night. It must have been about 5 minutes after I pressed send. My heart was beating fast with excitement when I knew he had pressed accept. I even rolled over on the bed 3 times and hit the pillow several times until it made a dent. Then I lowered my head hard onto the pillow before bouncing around with my heart swelling.

This is the feeling when someone you secretly like accepts as a friend. No wonder why when Jack added Friend, he accepted it and he screamed throughout the cafeteria and jumped around for a long time. So I didn't wait and immediately clicked to take a look. But it didn't seem to help me learn more about him.

Because on his timeline page there were only pictures of two cats, which were assumed to be foster cats. with mostly natural images Altogether, there are about 200 pictures, but there aren't any pictures of myself or any of my friends. Even his profile picture is a picture of his pet cat. Hmm....This man loves animals. Even so, the eyes were so gentle when taking pictures of the puppies in front of the Faculty of Economics building that day.

Then a week later I found out that it was true. And Shane is close to me, just across the street. Shane's and mine's schools are located opposite each other. Why is the outfit so familiar? Where has he been in the past? We've never met. It's very unfortunate. By the time I got to know him, I was already in my last year of high school.

But there must be a reason why we've met now. I believe that After I found out he was on the other side. I was only secretly looking for him. I always sat and waited for him at the bus stop in front of the school, waiting until he walked out of school with his gang of friends. Which I myself do regularly without realizing it. I do this every time.

Day after day, I still thought of myself as a psychopath. I watched him walk as far as I could see. But there was never a day when he turned to look at me. Until the time when there was a school event where I took on the role of MC alongside 'Pim', my new friend from another class. Surprisingly, Pim and I have both studied here since middle school.

But he and I have never met. We both laughed at the stories that each of us took turns telling. We meet everywhere in the evening after school to practice lines. Until we became close friends from different rooms, different genders, and everyone laughed like crazy and competed with each other all the time. Then the big rehearsal day arrived.

Everyone who had duties related to tomorrow's work stayed until nightfall. I only found out that Pim's house was close to my house that day. So we agreed that we would take the bus back together. We sat and waited at the bus stop in front of the school for a while. Before he heard a group of men coming from the school across the street.

Because this month is the time when every school has a big event, it shouldn't be surprising that there are still people in that school at this time. I turned towards the sound I heard before a group of men walked out of the school. As the typing itself began to move closer and closer to me, I turned to look at it confusedly.

before crying out in my heart With a soft laugh, he asked, 'Are you afraid?' I looked up and nodded slowly up and down. So I asked back, 'I'm a man. Aren't you scared when typing?' I got a smile back with the answer, 'I'm not afraid, you're my friend, right? Haha.' I laughed at the talkative person.

before turning his attention back to the group of men across from him. Before I noticed that two people in the group seemed to be looking at us and gossiping about something. Before one of the two men nudged the person in the middle of the circle to turn and look at us. I froze as the man turned around. Shane, I recognized him as soon as he turned around. Even though it was dark, there was no way I could recognize him.

He turned to look at the print before shifting his gaze to look at me. He smiled at me as if he remembered me. So I smiled back before the view in front of me was obscured by a large bus.

'The Chain Smoker' I hesitantly looked at Chain's Facebook name. Part of me wants to greet him. But on the other hand, I didn't dare. But in the end, I decided to type a message into the chat box before pressing delete. After typing and deleting for a while, I started to give up. Sigh! All right, say hello like a friend, Belin. A friend, a friend.

'Hey....' I pressed delete before typing again.

'Hi...'Tektektektekhehehehehehehe! What should I say to him? After thinking for a moment, I remembered that the other day I saw him walking with my best friend Dear in the club. Well, that's it.

‘Hello, Shane?’ I pressed send before slamming the screen onto the table. Before deciding to grab it and jump onto the bed to wait for a reply from the other party.

Ding! My heart began to beat faster and faster. I didn't dare open the screen to see if it was a message from the person I was waiting for. Until another message came in, so I braved it and picked up my phone to look at it.

'Yes, Guchen.'

'who?'

Ahggiphonthae32 68*/*03Phrachart I put down my phone before getting up and jumping on the bed while shouting without a sound. for fear of disturbing people in the house Before sitting still, he took one deep breath and picked up his phone to reply to Shane's message.

'This is Ben, Belin, do you remember?' I pressed send with a trembling hand. Ding!

'Oh, I remember.' I really couldn't stop myself from smiling. That's how I feel when talking to people I like.

It's been three months since I talked to Shane through a popular chat application. We talked about general things, life, studies, homework, miscellaneous things, but in all conversations I was the one who greeted him first. always He answered quickly, sometimes slowly. But most of them are short answers. I can just say hello to him in the app. But when we actually met

I don't have enough courage to say hello to him like other friends. I feel like I've gotten a little annoyed lately when I've been out, but I still don't stop trying. I say hello to him every night. But it seems like I'm trying so hard that I'm like a fool who only greets him all the time. Even though he himself didn't want to answer.

I just don't want to lose my friendship with anyone. I know that every time we meet, he knows that I'm the one who greeted him. But he himself didn't seem to attach much importance to it. Until one day I decided to stop greeting him, stop looking at him, stop...liking him. I know that breaking up with someone isn't as easy as it was when you first liked them.

But I think in just three months I felt good. I gave it to him for only a short period of time. Soon I will forget him. I know it will take three days, one week, three months, I don't know.

Three months ago I felt happier than ever before. I understand the moments of people who secretly like me. I learned a lot and the important thing that I learned was a feeling in this life that I never thought I would ever experience, 'heartbreak'. Hey, who would have thought that one day someone like me would secretly like someone? person And who would have thought that The feeling of being heartbroken...will it hurt this much?

Not long after that Maybe two weeks or a month. I also heard that he was dating someone. And I'm pleased. Congratulations to both him and myself. Congratulations to him for meeting the right person. And congratulate yourself for giving up on time. Because if I continue to like him I might be hurting more than I already am.

I could only smile sadly to myself and tell myself, 'That's good. It's good like this'

I found out a week later that his girlfriend was another close friend of mine. A friend who is perfect in everything I just found out from my roommate that he secretly liked typing for a while. They talked for a while before deciding to get together. I just smiled like a fool. I should have known from the beginning that he liked to type. He doesn't like me.

I must say that he likes women. I don't like men. Huh! I laughed just thinking about it. I should have known from the beginning. I probably shouldn't have greeted him from the beginning. I probably didn't know him from the beginning. We shouldn't have known each other from the beginning. I should have known from the beginning that I was the only one thinking about it.

Because Pim and I went home the same way. Pim and I met at the bus stop in front of the school every day. Including fans of the print. Pim and I talk every day. Pim always tells stories about himself and his girlfriend every time we meet. He used to walk to the bus stop to drop off prints every day, but I usually came out to wait after he left, so I didn't get to see him in person.

But today, I don't know what inspired him to come to print during this time. This is the time when he should have gone home every day. Today I saw him and Pim standing hand in hand at the bus stop. I turned around before moving some distance away from the two of them. Enough that I couldn't hear the two of them talking or laughing.

Five minutes later I glanced over and saw him waving goodbye with a smile on his face. He walked past me as if we were strangers. There wasn't even a smile to greet me like the first day we met.

All alone I watch you watch her

Like she’s the only girl you’ve ever seen

You don’t care you never did

You don’t give a damn about me

Yeah all alone I watch you watch her

She’s the only thing you’ve ever seen

How is it you never notice

That you are slowly killing me

I looked at her, looking at the woman all alone.

It was as if that person was the only woman she had ever seen.

She doesn't care, never cared.

Never thought of me at all

I looked at her, looking at the woman all alone.

It was as if that person was the only woman she had ever seen.

Why haven't you noticed?

That you're going to kill me alive

After a while, he walked back the same way before turning to say to me, 'Fuck you! What should I do? I'm embarrassed.' Then he walked past me to look for a print. I still haven't had time to say anything. Huh! I just smiled to myself. No matter how much I want to hate him But in the end, I still like him.

I hate you I love you

I hate that I love you

Don’t want to, but I can’t put

Nobody else above you

I hate you I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I’ll never be her

I hate you. I love you.

I hate myself for loving you.

I really don't want to. But I gave it to someone else.

Can't be above you.

I hate you. I love you.

I hate myself for wanting you.

But she wanted that woman. She couldn't be without that woman.

And I will never be able to be like that girl.

A month later I heard from a friend. Others in school said They broke up, I don't want to know why they broke up. When I give up and quit, I will cut off everything about him. I don't know anything about him. That way, I will be able to truly let go of him. I live my life He lived his life.

He and I haven't seen each other again or even talked through the app. Until the last day of high school arrived. On the final day of orientation for Mathayom 6 students, the school allows outsiders to come and congratulate the students. So he and I met for the first time after I decided to shut down everything I knew about him.

I was taking pictures with friends from another room and receiving congratulations from juniors I knew. As for him, he came to take pictures with Jack. Because Jack was standing near me, we couldn't help but meet. We turned and looked at each other for a moment. I was helpless but smiled back at him awkwardly before turning around to receive the things from the younger siblings again.

Before the juniors, the student committee announced that all graduating students would gather in the dome. I turned around to call Jack who was frantically taking pictures. Before he asked me to take a photo But I refused I thought it would complain about rushing it, but it seems like the person who was annoyed and spoke up was someone else standing next to it. 'Come in and take pictures, it's a waste of time.

You guys will hurry and enter the dome.' I could only stand there with my face numb for a while before politely refusing. He then looked annoyed before turning back to taking photos. In the past, he must have always been annoyed with me. Must have endured a lot. I'd like to say a word of apology to him. But when the third announcement sounded, Jack grabbed my hand and ran towards the dome.

That was my last memory of him. I don't know how he is now. For two years after that I didn't see him again. I don't know if he still remembers this annoying person.

Belin