The tip of his hand's touch The birth of the dark shadow in my heart..

Male masseuse

Day One – Essential Oils

“Tina Spa welcomes you. Would you be interested in getting a Thai massage or an oil massage?” A young female employee in a straight, maroon dress greeted her. When I opened the shop door Today I felt tired and wanted to kill time while waiting for my girlfriend who had a dinner date with her co-workers in a department store on On Nut Road. I chose a massage shop near the department store to relax myself during the day. Waiting

“The female employees in the queue aren't available at all. Can you be a male employee? The weight of your hand can be adjusted as desired,” the same girl offered.

When I agreed, she brought me into a comfortable, cream-colored cotton robe and waited on the edge of a futon at the end of the shop. The mattresses were placed on a raised wooden floor lined up. My legs hanging from the edge of the bed were low enough that the soles of my feet touched the cool tile floor. The soft sound of a fiddle playing came from the speaker on the towel rack. Creates quite a feeling of relaxation.

“Hello, may I wash your feet for you?” said a young man who looked older. Probably in his mid-twenties, he said hello. He looked different from the other masseuses. Even in the same dark brown masseuse uniform. Maybe it was because his pale skin color contrasted with his enviably black hair and eyebrows. Or because of the faded lips that speak and smile

No.. probably because of the spa employee's shirt he wore. It's not as closed off as other people's. From this angle where I'm sitting I could see through the white flesh of the person who was carefully washing my feet. He used his bare palms to scoop up warm water and sprinkled it on his shins, then rubbed his soft hands up and down, the white frangipani flowers on the surface of the foot bath floating and swinging.

The smell of bergamot from the water in the tub wafted into the tip of his nose. The young man put my feet on a white towel. Then wipe it carefully. He asked me to lie down on a soft mattress. The sound of curtains drawing was accompanied by darkness from the obscured light bulbs. An abbreviated version of a prayer for worshiping the teacher.

"I can tell you it's too heavy." Then the masseuse began to press his palms down on the soles of the feet as per the procedure. In fact, I often massage myself. It can be said that almost every month. Especially if after practicing playing tennis there are some sprains in the muscles. They will massage the lines to relieve tightness in the body.

Only this time It was my first time having a massage with a non-female doctor. His hand weight was incredible. It presses deeper into the line than anyone I've ever been through.

“The line in the middle of the back is very tight. Let me put some balm on you.” The fragrance evaporated and the feeling of liquid dripping down your back. I was startled a bit before I regained my composure. And then the fingertips of the young masseuse Then smear balm on the middle of the back. Warmth penetrates the skin His palms, soft but rough with fingertips, climbed up from the line of his hips. Walk up the spine to the shoulder line.

“Your figure is really good.” The male doctor invited me to talk, similar to what other mattresses do. But he kept his voice low so as not to disturb the other guests too much.

“I play sports almost every day. It was close to the competition so I practiced very hard. The line is really tight. I'm a little tired, little one."

“Looking at your figure, I knew right away. That he's an athlete." There was a laugh in his throat. Like a proud person who guessed correctly.

"Do you consider it a compliment, eh? Or do you secretly scold each other for your tough body and rough skin? Should I be happy?"

“Hahaha, look..please turn your face to the right,” he requested when changing the massage position. So that my straight left arm could have a freer direction, my left cheek was pressed against the low, flat pillow. So I can see the massage therapist more clearly from this angle of lying on my stomach. He gave me a soft smile.

Before straddling my back, carefully using the palm of my hand to press along the shoulder line. After a while it turned into a slow humping of my arm muscles all the way to the end of my wrist.

When finished from the prone position in the first hour It was time to lie on my back with my arms on Nong Dol's lap. A young student of traditional Thai medicine at a polytechnic college. who came to ask for an internship at this massage shop, I also asked him about his free time activities. and volunteered to teach Nong Don how to play tennis, climbed his finger and pressed it on the front of my arm. The sun-tanned skin color contrasted clearly with his smooth white hands.

The back of my hand was placed on the masseuse's groin. He held out his palm, which was warm and steamy from the balm that had stained his hand, and touched mine. He twisted and rubbed it, then lifted my hand up and intertwined it with his. Hold, squeeze and release, alternating four or five times. Another three drops of evaporated oyster oil. Squeezed from the bottle, it fell down and touched the skin in the crook of my neck.

It flows into the neckline. He took his soft hand and gently rubbed it. A smell similar to some kind of flower entered my nose. It smells too good.. From being drowsy just a moment ago Something woke up.

both the feelings and the core of the body which tenses I had to breathe deeper to swallow the relief from the nice coolness of the massage room. before taking another deep breath When my arms were crossed above my head Male masseuse straddling my body My heart is racing..

Day Two – Under the familiar shower of loneliness

What the hell is wrong with me? Hey! Consciousness is with your body, you idiot. Kwan, oh Kwan, my son.

The sun has risen. Even though it was Sunday, it was not an excuse to roll over naked on the bed like this. I continued to lie and stare at the ceiling hole in my bedroom for a long time. before forcing his lifeless body to take a shower

My condition has deteriorated since I was a handsome young man. Mr. Dol, a good masseuse Lift my legs over my shoulders. Whoever uses it, walk with your hands and press along the calves and thighs. Makes me breathless Especially when the masseuse leans forward. My left leg was resting on his shoulder. Then he threw himself and pushed until his knees were almost close to his chest. Our faces are very close. It stayed on me like that for a long time.

He used those clear, round eyes to stare at me. As if under a spell I don't even remember breathing. Memories are lost Only feelings remain

His palm pressed against the front of my right leg, stretching it tight. Press and hold for a while like that. And then it was like the world around us stopped spinning. The front of his leg rested under the crook of my thigh. Until I felt the hem of our pants rubbing against each other. That's almost the last memory I remember. Everything is blurry

The alarm clock sounded softly. Said that the amount of time has been completed

Don raised his hands to worship me while sitting cross-legged. It's a sign that we have to say goodbye..

On the way home Cherry kept asking me: What's wrong with me? Why are you so quiet? She thought I was angry at myself for spending time partying with friends and making me wait so long. Actually, we argue or argue about this all the time. She likes to think on her own sometimes. But I'm used to it. Because we have been together since school with the influence of adults. My mother and Cherry's mother are very close.

“Nat, are you going to the court with me this afternoon?” my tennis practice partner called and asked. When I saw that I didn't reply to the group line.

"Probably not. Today I'm tired. I'll see you tomorrow evening." I refused him because I knew that Today I probably won't be able to focus on practice. So I spent the afternoon walking around the mall near my townhouse. However, buying things is probably not the main reason. I chose to wander around and look.

Then I decided to walk out of the mall and into the alley next to the mall exit. The same place I came to yesterday evening.

..He is there. Standing in a uniform similar to the original Just not as wrinkled as yesterday's dress.

Dol stood in front of Tina Spa, folding a pile of towels on a marble horse in front of the building. He carefully placed the laundry in a wicker basket. There are many pairs of removed shoes of service users lined up in front of the store. My masseuse looked perfectly white under the soft sunlight. His hair had turned brown from the brightness of the air.

Dol's tall but thin figure Although looking thicker than the female employee who had just walked back into the store. But immediately looked brighter. When the new arrival is a tall and stocky male customer. He invited Don to follow him into that shop.

I sat in a coffee shop, a table next to a clear glass wall. Take your time with the bakery and drinks in front of you as slowly as possible. alternating with looking through the gray blinds at the front of the massage shop There are people passing in and out all the time. Maybe it's because the area is full of vendors who rely on massages to relax the body from a tiring day. Therefore, there are many massage shops lined up, just like coffee shops.

“Oh, yes, Cherry, feel free. Nat said she'll go home soon. Hmm.. Yes, it's better now. Be careful if you come back after dark. Okay..if you get home, please tell me via Line." I quickly hung up the phone from the interlocutor. When he saw Dol walk out and send that big customer home. The two of them had disappeared into the store for an hour. I saw that Dol raised his hands in greeting as the customer handed over a red bill.

It's deserved.. This male masseuse has impressed people with his skills, so he probably gives massages like this to everyone. I don't get any special treatment. The masseuse uses the same trick. They're all the same. “I'm nothing special,” one person said to himself in a coffee shop when he thought so. I called to check the bill. and prepare to go home to rest.

Under the familiar shower Rivers of water sprayed down. I soaked my head and face. The strong flow of water washed away both the dust and the dust. and probably carried away the confusion in my mind as well I put my hand in to adjust the temperature to make the oil line warmer. Lift your head so that the splashing water directly touches your cheek.

The water was as warm as someone's breath. I accidentally ran my hand over my body, following the traces of yesterday's touch.

The palm of your hand rubbing the muscles on your chest. I lowered my hand down to scrub my abdomen, right where my muscles were. and two palms lower When you turn on the water harder and take a deep, heavy breath. The remaining palm tightly grips the shower faucet..

I adjusted the water to flow as hard as I could before pulling out the wind and letting my heart out.

... Someone's face was clear in their feelings and it stayed that way until the night passed.

Third day – Want to taste the gray texture.

"Nat, do you want to go eat porridge with me?" Chet, a friend and partner joins in tennis practice. invited me, who was topless to change into a sweaty shirt in the locker room

“No, now that it's evening, I don't want to eat anything. Don't eat too much, Jett. Don't put anything in your mouth after 6 p.m. The doctor said it was not good.”

“Wow, what takes care of your figure like that? Just like this, you will make me far away from you guys. This still annoys me. The fourth chord has only busty girls looking at you. This is if you don't already have a boyfriend. You probably already arranged it for me, right Ain Nat? Ha ha ha.”

“You just said, well, I'm going, Chet. See you tomorrow.” Then I grabbed my things from my locker and headed back home. However, home is probably not the destination. I'm standing in front of Tina Spa. Be prepared to take off your shoes and walk in. There were two employees who were free in line sitting near the counter. DL is one of them. He looked straight and smiled.

But that smile suddenly disappeared. When I decided to choose the female masseuse sitting next to me instead.

Honestly, maybe it was because I wanted to make up for the crazy feelings from two days ago. The turmoil in my head that Nong Dol caused me. Go back to the previous No one made me like this, so after today it would prove that I'm strong enough and don't have to worry about the little things. that disturbs the mind

That is, sometimes the heart is a weak thing. and adjust to flow according to the surroundings It's normal. And I will be a normal person too. I said to myself and Nong Namwan, the masseuse I chose. will be the one to prove it

I lay on my stomach in the same position. Before the female employee would trace the lines with her hands according to the steps that had been taught. Even though the weight of his hand was not as deep as the previous person's, But after all, this girl's massage can be used quite a bit. She has soft skin on her hands. The kind that women in general should have.

When he turned his head on his side, he turned his face towards the empty mattress on his side. Now another masseuse brings a customer to get ready as a Chinese-faced man with thick muscles. Lie down on the mattress. I glanced at his feet. The new masseuse was standing there. Dol looked back at me with an emotionless expression. I stared back at him like that. Until the curtain was pulled between us by Dol's own hand.

“Is your house around here? Just like the other day, you stopped by once, right?” The masseuse tried for the third or fourth time to strike up a conversation. But it didn't make me answer anything more than asking for an answer. I spent some time listening to the bed next to me. Through the curtain panel

“Your body is really good.” The same sentence was said again, but this time he didn't use it towards me. He uses it on other people. In the end, it's just a bad tactic to win over customers. See the innocent face In fact, it is full of dazzling features. Those thin red lips It only spewed out poison. Don't trust those innocent eyes, I reminded myself throughout the hour and a half that I spent.

A sound of giggles came through the curtains. I tried to look through the curtains that were fluttering with the wind from the air conditioner. But it didn't work. I see only the blur. A young boy sat astride a large man. He leaned down and pressed the man's back. In the same way as you did with me. I am nothing special to him..

Marble horse table in front of the shop I am finished with massage. Order a cup of hot lemongrass tea and drink it. After paying and tipping the female employee Another half hour has passed. The male masseuse walked out and sent the customer. He turned to look at me and bowed his head in greeting. But there was no smile from those pale red lips.

Before he walked back into the store without looking back again..

I thought to myself that I had to stop. It crosses too many emotional lines. Before anything could lead to me going astray, I picked up my cell phone and called Cherry. To make an appointment with her after we haven't seen each other often lately. which might make her think The mystery of the number seven will come true. I can't put her in this beautiful but cold tray any longer.

Under a large umbrella that was spread out to block out the dew. lined up in rows There were many customers lined up, every table full. The small van was decorated in sweet pink. Applied as a mobile store The side wall of the car was drilled into a shelf. Two employees standing in the car There is a jar of jelly and crisps. chocolate machine ground almonds lined up on the counter

“Nee Nat, I haven't taken Cherry to drink hot milk at this restaurant for a very long time. Every time I've invited him, he hasn't come out to accept me lately,” my girlfriend said in a pleading tone.

“I'm sorry, after practice I wanted to go home. As soon as the competition is finished, this season will slow down. I'll find time to see you more often.” I promised her with my words and a shy smile.

"Nat...do you still love Cherry?"

“Cherry wants to be a bride.”

Day Four – With the folly and cowards of yesterday

“Khun Teerakrit, please return the documents.” My secretary Remind the boss who is sitting absentmindedly looking at the sky and looking at the clouds by the window abnormally. Until I feel guilty Makes me have to pull myself back quickly. That effort lasted long enough until half-past four. When you get off work I called to cancel practice with Chet, giving the reason that his condition still had not improved from the day before. My friend understood very well before rushing to get on the BTS and get off at Phra Khanong Station.

“Hmm, I'm really tired. Would you like a Thai massage or an oil massage today?” the receptionist asked in a surprisingly friendly way. I felt embarrassed and looked at the waiter waiting in line for the massage. Three female employees And another young man sat stunned. There was no smile sent as usual.

“Today, I want to be a younger man. Fits a dislocated shoulder I want to have a lot of strength.” I added a hundred and eight reasons. So that choosing a male masseuse has the most weight.

"Yes, Nong Dol, take the customer to the bed 7 times. Please give me some strength, focusing on the shoulders and neck." Then the receptionist He forwarded me to the queue owner.

The massage proceeds in similar steps. Change sometimes according to the masseuse's design. It may be adjusted according to the tension of the lines that the masseuse feels. But can he sense that it's tighter than the customer's line? is the atmosphere between him and me

“Please move up a little more.”

"yes"

We didn't have a conversation. Except he told me to turn over. Or asked if it hurts? Until the time is almost up When he moved to sit behind me, he was sitting cross-legged. My body is erect. Hands clasped in front of my lap, I was kneeling behind him, pulling the back of my neck against his sagging abdomen. The wind from the air conditioner blows softly.

Dol's hair was blown away. I look up from this angle. See his face in an upside-down view

Even without a smile But it made my heart so full..

..I smelled a light scent like some kind of flower. It might be from fabric softener. Or the soap he uses

It probably has a massage oil smell like this, I thought to myself..

He carefully placed his forearm on my shoulder, close to my neck. Then let the weight down little by little. I could feel that the tendons in my body around this shoulder were alternately tightening and relaxing. The tip of the masseuse's chin It touched the tip of my hair near the nape of my neck until I could feel the sound of my breathing in my ear, but it was no louder than the sound of my heart beating rapidly.

“If you want a doctor who is tough. There is another elder, named P'Kan, and the weight of his hand can press harder than I can. I can recommend it.”

“Give me a massage. Is it really that tiring? Is this really the point of driving you away?” I used a teasing tone. But in his heart, he suddenly dropped to the mattress he was sitting on.

“No, I'm afraid you won't like my skills. Which we can tell. You can change the masseuse until you like it. I saw yesterday that you didn't choose to use me anymore.” I wish there was more sarcasm in my tone, similar to when Cherry was annoyed with me.

“I think I have found a doctor I really like. I'm sorry I didn't choose yesterday. I'm afraid that Dol will lie and say that I'm attracted to him, but it's true.”

I knew immediately that he had been silent for a moment. Then he switched to chopping his shoulders with the ridge of his hand that quickly pounded down on his shoulders along the shoulder line. Now everything seems to be shaking. When the end of the massage is near I want it to stay like this for a while longer. I wanted him to continue caressing my shoulders for a long time, but then the sound of the curtains opening woke me up from my reverie.

There will be a day when the party ends. Just Dol's palm spell didn't end the same way.

I ordered cold bael fruit juice to drink at the marble horse in front. Then wait for him to come out after collecting his things.

Even though there are many queues for massage Especially an elderly monk who reserved a male masseuse to massage his muscles in a private VIP room at the top of the building. But Dolden came and saw the glass that was left with only ice in front of me.

“Want to get more?”

“No, that's enough.”

“It's free, I don't charge extra.” Then he added bael fruit juice from the pitcher and returned it until it was full. Told me that he brought it as a free gift for the customer.

I picked up two red bills and handed them to Dol. One more than the tall man I saw the other day. Sent it to my masseuse. He raised his hand in thanks. And told me that you don't have to tip often. I want me to have money left over to get another massage. I smiled back and got on the motorcycle that Win had hired to take me to a townhouse not too far away.

On the same balcony from yesterday I sat in a nice wooden chair. Take the unsalted bread you carried in your hand from the convenience store in front of the alley and put it into your mouth. Enjoying the coolness of the air in front of me, I looked up at the sky. Why is there no moon tonight? Or it might be behind that cloud..

The phone rang on a lonely star night. I let it ring like that. Tomorrow I'll make amends with Cherry. before continuing to turn to the dark sky Take time for yourself with a couple of beers and a long night..

Day Five – A heart that cries and begs.

“Should we talk a little this evening?” came Cherry's voice on the other end of the line. I hurried out of the office. Take the BTS and get off at Phra Khanong Station. To find her at the condominium Cherry has a house on the Thonburi side. But I moved to this area to be close to my work. She chose to leave a good job in an office near Pinklao.

and then become an employee in a smaller organization Just to be near me

In the coffee shop under the condo The clear glass lets in light. Even the air conditioning in the shop is turned up until it's cold. But I could feel the warmth coming through the glass.

Cherry was worried about the hurried sentence she had said the other day. Then I became quiet until I seemed to disappear. Today's meeting should be about managing our relationship in the same way that we have been doing for the past 7 years, when the time seems to be at a dead end. We would turn to talk to settle things and she said that it was something that all her friends envied of her who had such a calm and wonderful boyfriend in their minds.

“The ice has completely melted. Don't rush to drink it. It won't taste good."

I reached out and picked up a little sweet green tea. with whipped cream floating on the edge of the glass Swing the straw to let the thickness of the green tea cover the melted ice. Then he picked it up and drank it.

Our talk There are both opinions. interspersed with some emotional expressions Even though we are in our thirties But that doesn't mean that Our maturity in expressing our opinions is cool with age. Feelings of disillusionment and disillusionment in relationships Even the things that I want to happen between me and her was brought and exchanged

Actually, it has always been like this for a long time. Of course, I know that. It won't be the last time. The cycle of talking to each other about this matter will come around again soon.

When I finished taking her to the room I kissed her delicately on the forehead. It is a promise that tomorrow will be better. Then I got back on the BTS to On Nut Station, which was only one stop away. But it feels like a long time. Because today I will do something. which challenges itself to the utmost

I got off the subway and walked across the department store to a familiar alley. I walked into the Thai massage shop, “Chalalai,” two blocks from the shop I was regular at this week. I chose a burly male masseuse. Listen to the accent and know that you are a foreigner. He took me to a room on the second floor.

Even though there are no curtains to hide the view But the private room has solid walls. Being far enough from those around you to release the bondage in your heart. I took off all my clothes. There was only one towel left.

“Oil massage for an hour and a half, please. Is it convenient to take it all off?” The muscular masseuse said with an accent from a neighboring country. He walked closer and put his hand on the towel. The last piece of clothing on my body The piece that was now had been thrown away by the doctor at the foot of the bed.

Then I was led to the bed. When he had spread his naked body, he laid himself on his stomach. With a Burmese masseuse slowly applying oil to my body. Alternate with massage and ironing. His rough palms traced each section of hair in almost every organ that was visible to the naked eye.

He took off his own shirt and sat on my back. Pour oil over shoulder sprinkled down to the hips There was a weight pressing down on my butt cheeks until it felt heavier.

He set aside a bottle of lavender essential oil, which I always choose when I'm stressed out from a tiring job. But today it didn't feel very fragrant. He rubbed it and scrubbed the crevices of my body with his rough hands. Smear it on the buttocks. Then press and hold the palm on the thigh. After a while, I turned over on my back.

Mr. Aung Kyo, the male masseuse, had heavy hands holding my legs apart. Climb up and close the air door on my groin. Hold it like that. He looked at my face and smiled before relaxing his hand. The blood in his body rushed from the force of his hand. My veins throbbed until I could feel it.

Fragrant oils were poured in until my skin was moisturized. He gave me a rough hand. Massaging the area under my breasts and then moving down to my lower abdomen, he purposely ran his forearm across and flicked across my lower abdomen, often. Then something that had been thrown around began to stand up. Made me have to raise my head to see. What does the masseuse intend to do? I found that..he was holding it in his hand.

The male masseuse asked me: “Do you want me to give it away?” I don't know. How should I answer? It was the first time I had been treated like this by a non-female masseuse. But I couldn't resist the emotions that aroused me. I nodded in response.

“Gently 300.” He held up his right hand that wasn't touching me.

“Like this, 500.” He pointed his finger at his own thick lips.

“Or everything, a thousand.”

Aung Kyo poured oil from the bottom of the bottle for the last time. Sprinkled on the core of my rising body I looked at the blurry ceiling. With dry breaths and closed eyes close to sleep A hard, deflated abdomen that rose and fell. Even though the lights are dim, I'm afraid to tell myself In that imagination You can still see someone's face up there, on the white ceiling...Dl.

etc    

Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 and 2 special chapters

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