A young man who was confused and lost for a moment. He found his own hands stained with blood. I don't know what I did before.

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I stared at the dark red stain on my hand for a long time. Still unable to compose my own thoughts and feelings at the present. Everything happened so suddenly that I couldn't keep up. I realized that the event had ended just now. Why are there red stains on our hands? What exactly happened? Hey..what do we do?

Confusion and shock began to take hold. and squeezed my consciousness away from my body every time I raised that hand and looked closer. So close that the lines of his handwriting could be clearly seen. Including the intensity of the blood which is redder than red. Yes..it's the red color of blood. It's not just red. And it couldn't have been my blood.

Because after carefully examining the hand By turning around Look around for any wrinkles or wounds that may be found, but none appear. If so, it couldn't be any other way.

“Her blood,” my voice said to myself, soft and smooth. Not showing any feelings at all Until the owner of the voice couldn't help but be surprised. Are we really this numb? Even though her body was still in a pool of blood It clearly appears in front of us.

This time is the rainy season. And allergy symptoms, which are like a true friend who refuses to leave the body, often get worse. I have a stuffy nose. And there is secretion in the nasal cavity almost all the time. It's annoying and irritating. and is a considerable obstacle to daily life But what can I do? When it cannot be cured The only way is

Having to live with a disease that eats away like leeches sucking the blood of a buffalo. Because of this, the nose is almost useless. It's still difficult to breathe. Sense of smell is even worse. I didn't smell any blood. Even with this obvious mess on your hand

The still corpse looked so lonely. in the coolness and humidity of the temperature inside the room With the light from the soft white chopstick bulbs hidden in the holes in the ceiling shining down. It really highlighted the deep red color of the dried and crusted blood. The feelings that are building in my heart right now Halfway between regret and indifference, it doesn't go all the way to the end.

It's not that much of a regret. It is not true to say that it is indifferent and does not ripple like a lake without ripples.

Inside the cramped rectangular room, there was no more than four square meters of space. Me and the corpse, we were so close to each other. Just reach out all the way. can sense the existence of a body without a soul Suddenly I felt hot. And it seems to be getting hotter little by little. What a frustrating conflict. This room is cold and humid.

But the temperature inside my body rose. Let's wash your hands first. The coolness of the water probably helps the brain to clear up. There will be good ideas. And having blood on your hands for a long time is not very pleasant. So I reached out with my other hand and pushed the stem of the faucet, the glistening silver reflecting the light against the pearly white of the sink.

Then, a fluffy white stream flowed out like a waterfall. So gentle and gentle Gives you a feeling of lightness and relaxation. When the skin comes in contact with the cool water molecules.

“Ah….”

I closed my eyes and felt the cool water flowing, washing away the dirt and heat from my hands. Slowly caressing and rubbing both hands together. Inch by inch Don't want to rush to finish it quickly. It was as if the water would help wash away all the sins that he had committed and flow down the hole into the sewer.

I don't know how long I soaked my hands like that. I heard the sound of water hitting the tub and swirling down the hole loudly for a long time. Create unimaginable enjoyment Until he opened his eyes and looked at the person in the mirror in front of him. Then he looked down at his pale hand. The fingertips became wrinkled from being washed away by water for a long time.

So gradually bring your consciousness back to the present moment again. I pushed the faucet handle to face the other way. The water has stopped flowing. But the water droplets from his hand continued to gather and fall onto the sink for a while longer.

“Did I just accidentally kill you?!”

This sentence resounds in my head and refuses to go away. Really unbelievable that the person in the mirror's reflection would be cruel enough to commit murder youthful face The facial markings indicate that the ancestors have a cross-breed lineage between Thai and Chinese. Even in more than twenty years of life growing up My family would not like to take my children to the temple to make merit.

Like the old Chinese people who were only interested in doing business to make money. and have little belief or interest in the law of karma Life in the next world cycle of birth and death But I have a background of being someone who has been interested in knowing about religion since childhood. It's something I don't quite understand myself. Especially the Buddhism religion that they believe in.

Although it cannot be called a good Buddhist company At least there is still enough shame in doing all the bad things. and are more or less afraid of the consequences of the sins that he or she has committed And this time is the same.

I caressed the rough, rough fur that had recently emerged from the skin beneath my chin. He put his face closer to the corpse, less than a foot away. Anger is like a hair that cannot be removed. We know it exists, it happens and it is frustrating. But it was not possible to completely exterminate the roots. Beards are no different.

I just shaved yesterday. Today, when I rubbed it, I felt irritation in my hand.

“Please forgive me. I really didn't mean to kill you. Damn it.” It's a heartfelt request for apology and remorse. But no matter how I listen to it, I like it. Even myself couldn't help but feel that way. And you, the owner of this body Will you forgive me for my sins? It's a matter that no one can answer.

The still corpse could hardly be seen as alive. Have you ever had a similar situation before? It's too "messy" for identification officials from any agency to be able to clearly pinpoint it. In addition to predicting and making assumptions from the environment at the scene of the incident. A murderer like me couldn't even believe his own eyes that were staring.

Just one slip of the hand. But it was the only time that brought her immediate death.

Guilt begins to take its toll on the heart. Beyond the reasoning in my brain that is spinning so fast right now. Try to discern an excuse that is weighty enough to be heard. To hypnotize myself into believing that this isn't my fault. But it was you who caused it. She was the one who came in to fight and get involved. Never ending pestering

Even though I don't play Try your hardest to control your emotions. Don't get irritated and irritated. Because he was afraid that he would accidentally give in to his anger and do something serious. But she's the one who doesn't love me well. Disobedient to pleas That you don't come to harass me again. We have nothing to do with each other.

May each side stay Which way is it?

But she didn't listen and remained stubborn. Followed into the private area within this bathroom. I was about to take off the towel I was wearing. Then she bares her body and challenges the cool water from the waiting shower. You rushed in as if you held a grudge for a million lifetimes. Staring at my blood like a giantess in an ancient folk tale on Channel 7 on weekend mornings.

Even though we had never known each other before. Didn't even say hello Smile at each other or laugh. The bathroom is just this small. Where can I escape every time? So, one last time, I shook my hand away. I didn't mean to. I thought she was afraid and ran away. But with a sudden burst of irritation

The strength and speed could not be held back. She was crushed to death on the mosaic wall. It left behind a trail of black debris and a large cluster of blood clinging to it as clear evidence.

This is what is called anger! I'm terrified of myself. Who knows? Today it might just be mosquitoes. But if you allow the fire of anger raging in your chest to easily spit out lava to consume anyone, without control and knowing how to restrain One day, the corpse that appears in front of me might be a human being.

finish.